Ode to Women Drivers

With more women drivers, there are many survivors.
To all driving women, men, hold up your fivers.
They stop at the red lights; they wait at the orange
They quieten kids who are filled up with ‘porringe’.

Male driving’s a killer, oafish as a gorilla.
If female driving’s chocolate, male driving’s vanilla.
The streets would be filled with Buy Acomplia pills a thousand dead men
if it wasn’t for women holding back now and then.

In situations difficult, a woman’s the pilot.
They maintain composure even when turning violet.
Their dexterity hints at a strong carpal tunnel.
Three cars won’t let them in, but eventually one’ll.

Take on mere male drivers and you’re sure to win.
If Blackjack my cat had a crack, I’d back him in.
Even a naked cat could make wise selections
by using indicators and asking for directions

Women’s skills are uniting, they’ll fix any schism
as big as antidisestablishmentarianism.
They could even repair Darren Lockyer’s knee
if a skilled woman driver took on his surgery.

They can drive while they’re slicing in two a ham sandwich
while they fix their hair and change gears with the hand which
was recently comforting children who cry.
For all of these skills, men should rejoicify.

All men, boogie woogie, there’s no need to grieve.
If you love your driving, you gotta believe
That driving relaxes and is good for the soul,
When you sit back, relax, and let a girl take control.